Hello everyone, this is a contrast paragraph I wrote for my composition class, and has become my pride and joy, for the professor gave me a very good grade for it, so I wanted to share this with you, my lovely unexistant audience...
Men and women are different in many varied ways, but the most obvious (and laughable at) are behavioural differences. Let’s take, for instance the way men and women experience vanity. We can say men are vain because they will check themselves out in the mirror but women, on the other hand, are ridiculous; they will check out their reflections in any shiny surface-mirrors, spoons, store windows, toasters, and even a bald man’s head. This is related to the importance that men and women give to their clothes, which is enormous in the women’s case, who dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage answer the phone, read a book, get the mail… and of utter unimportance in the men’s who will dress up for: weddings, funerals. And since we got to the wedding theme, there are huge differences in the way women and men remember weddings, for when reminiscing about them, women talk about "the ceremony" while men talk about "the bachelor party". But differences have done nothing but start, for we have reach the perceptions about the telephone, which men see as a communication tool using it to send short messages to other people, but for women is something else entirely. A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours. But what could they possibly be talking about? Well, for starters, men. But also about diets and grooming, and how awful looked Whatshername with that oh-so-visible moustache, because (and here’s another difference) some men look good with moustaches (and those men are Tom Selleck (AKA Monica’s boyfriend for a season in “Friends”) and Sean Connery) but there is no way a woman will look good with moustaches, and someone should have said so to Frida Kahlo... But as most men don’t look good with moustaches either, you can always find a razor on a man’s bathroom, along with five other things: a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream a bar of soap, and a towel (that might be the same as his beach towel), in contrast, the average number of items in a typical woman's bathroom is 437 most of which a man would not be able to identify. To close up, I will make a little reflection about men and women’s handwritings, for I have noticed that men do not decorate their penmanship, they just chicken-scratch while women use scented, colored stationary and they dot their "i's" with circles and hearts, use ridiculously large loops in their "p's" and "g's" and make their notes a royal pain to read, for even when she's dumping you, she'll put a smiley face at the end of the note. I hope all of you had a good time after revising all these differences, which to my point of view are not only funny but also quite easily seen on our day to day lives.
If you can spot the sources of my inspiration, I will be delighted. In fact, I'll give you a lead: there are two, one of them is a web page, the other is a song... I think most of you will find the page, and none (unless you are one of my close friends) will get the song...
See ya my faithfull host of phantom followers, and that guy who's not a phantom, but a real person.
PS: Host = archaic term for army (from the word reference forum, I looked for an english word for "hueste" which, at the same time, is an archaic term for "army of followers " in spanish, and a
word I love but i never got a chance to use).
Men and women are different in many varied ways, but the most obvious (and laughable at) are behavioural differences. Let’s take, for instance the way men and women experience vanity. We can say men are vain because they will check themselves out in the mirror but women, on the other hand, are ridiculous; they will check out their reflections in any shiny surface-mirrors, spoons, store windows, toasters, and even a bald man’s head. This is related to the importance that men and women give to their clothes, which is enormous in the women’s case, who dress up to go shopping, water the plants, empty the garbage answer the phone, read a book, get the mail… and of utter unimportance in the men’s who will dress up for: weddings, funerals. And since we got to the wedding theme, there are huge differences in the way women and men remember weddings, for when reminiscing about them, women talk about "the ceremony" while men talk about "the bachelor party". But differences have done nothing but start, for we have reach the perceptions about the telephone, which men see as a communication tool using it to send short messages to other people, but for women is something else entirely. A woman can visit her girlfriend for two weeks, and upon returning home, she will call the same friend and they will talk for three hours. But what could they possibly be talking about? Well, for starters, men. But also about diets and grooming, and how awful looked Whatshername with that oh-so-visible moustache, because (and here’s another difference) some men look good with moustaches (and those men are Tom Selleck (AKA Monica’s boyfriend for a season in “Friends”) and Sean Connery) but there is no way a woman will look good with moustaches, and someone should have said so to Frida Kahlo... But as most men don’t look good with moustaches either, you can always find a razor on a man’s bathroom, along with five other things: a toothbrush, toothpaste, shaving cream a bar of soap, and a towel (that might be the same as his beach towel), in contrast, the average number of items in a typical woman's bathroom is 437 most of which a man would not be able to identify. To close up, I will make a little reflection about men and women’s handwritings, for I have noticed that men do not decorate their penmanship, they just chicken-scratch while women use scented, colored stationary and they dot their "i's" with circles and hearts, use ridiculously large loops in their "p's" and "g's" and make their notes a royal pain to read, for even when she's dumping you, she'll put a smiley face at the end of the note. I hope all of you had a good time after revising all these differences, which to my point of view are not only funny but also quite easily seen on our day to day lives.
If you can spot the sources of my inspiration, I will be delighted. In fact, I'll give you a lead: there are two, one of them is a web page, the other is a song... I think most of you will find the page, and none (unless you are one of my close friends) will get the song...
See ya my faithfull host of phantom followers, and that guy who's not a phantom, but a real person.
PS: Host = archaic term for army (from the word reference forum, I looked for an english word for "hueste" which, at the same time, is an archaic term for "army of followers " in spanish, and a
word I love but i never got a chance to use).
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